| I think it is fair to say that you are the person the | | | | our eyes, or the odd disgusting cigarette floating in |
| rest of us dread being near. We do not want to | | | | coffee left for us to discover. We nag about how |
| share an office with you because we either have to | | | | the house we live in smells. This nagging makes us |
| keep the window open at all times (which becomes | | | | hate ourselves, so you know. So we, too, start to |
| problematic on the days when the temperature dips | | | | think about ways of getting out of the house so we |
| below freezing or soars above scalding). We may | | | | can breathe. |
| have to beg for mercy and ask you not to smoke | | | | We do not like being out on the town with you |
| around us, or maybe we compromise and ask you to | | | | much. So many places do not allow you to smoke |
| cut the number of cigarettes you do smoke around | | | | and so our choice is either to sit alone while you go |
| us. It is not the basis for a fantastic working | | | | out and feed your habit, or to stand out on the |
| partnership. We might also change offices. | | | | street with you so we do not feel so alone. There |
| We do not want to sit in a car with you. The | | | | have certainly been fights that have erupted over |
| prospect of you lighting up makes our stomach curl | | | | this issue. What if you decide to flaunt it and smoke |
| up in a ball. In this case, even if the windows are | | | | in places where you are not supposed to, the |
| open, the smoke still wafts past in great clouds on its | | | | movies, the hallway, the hospital, the restaurant. That |
| way out. So when we get out of the car we smell | | | | is not fun either. We are co-conspirators without |
| like you do, gross. God forbid we have to be the car | | | | consent. |
| with the windows closed. It is just a place we do not | | | | We are better off really, staying away from you. It |
| want to go to, to be honest. | | | | is safer, physically and emotionally. We are better off |
| We hate sharing living space with you. It makes life | | | | looking for someone who wants to live this life on |
| at home a total drag. Some of us start finding ways | | | | more of an equal footing. Someone we can be |
| to not be at home so much. It is our way of being | | | | assured will be there in years to come, and will not |
| more at ease, in case you want to hate us. Some of | | | | be our patient to care for. |
| us opt to stay at home, and start nagging, about the | | | | So what do you do then? |
| full ashtrays, about the constant smoke which burns | | | | |